Alyssa: U-Turn to God

sunset

I am 27 years old and my addiction began when I was 14 years old.  I have tried to be rid of this addiction for years.   I have been in and out of treatment centers, detox facilities, AA and outpatient counseling, and I have been to jail twice.  I could never understand why I always ran back to the bottle and the drugs.  I had completely lost all hope.

On July 4, 2005, I had taken some pills and then went out to a bar with my co-workers.  As usual, I was in a black-out.  The next thing I knew, I was lying on the side of the road covered in blood and my car was smashed into a tree.  The passenger, who was a very close friend of mine, was not wearing a seatbelt and was ejected from the car on impact, landing in the street unconscious  By the grace of God, this man is alive today with no permanent damage.  If he had died, I would’ve had to live with the guilt of killing my friend.  I know God’s angels saved us that night.  Unfortunately almost killing myself and someone else was not enough to stop my addiction.

Guilt only fueled my addiction even more.  I became so damaged by painful memories, that using drugs to the extreme was the only way I could get through every day and night.  When I didn’t think a bottom could get any worse, it did.  I began to use drugs intravenously.  By February 2010, I ended up back in detox with no job, homeless, and my family wanted nothing to do with me.  I was utterly alone.  I desperately needed a Mighty Savior.

I came to Faith Farm broken, afraid and confused.  I couldn’t accept love from anyone, and I didn’t understand why all these women were hugging me telling me they loved me the first day I got here.  It was God’s love flowing through them and pouring onto me.  He knew I needed it.  I did not have a relationship with God when I came here, so praying and asking for help was hard at first.  But after surrendering and earnestly seeking Him, it’s like talking to a friend.  Peace is what I have been searching for all these years.  And, through prayer and His Word, He has truly brought peace to my heart.  I no longer relive the painful memories of my past.  God has set me free!

Thanks to God and Faith Farm, I can stand before you and say that I no longer have to believe the lies I have let Satan tell me for years.  I am not lost and confused.  I do have a purpose that is to worship the Lord.  He has truly redeemed my life.  He has brought me from being homeless with a needle in my arm to proclaiming my love for Him in a church by being baptized in His Name.

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